Out of Breath

When it comes to running any sort of race, any sort of distance, once the race is over one thing is for sure. Your breathing gets faster, your heart rate increases, your body become warmer, your chest starts to hurt, and your body start to tire. It's funny to hear what most people say right after they get done running; "I"m so out of shape!" Now this may be true for many people, but even those that have been training for a marathon, or the Olympics, still have to go through the pains that any sort of running is sure to bring on. What any runner knows though is that the quicker you recover, proves how good of shape you're in. The faster your body comes back to normal the better shape you're in. If it takes you a long time to regain your breath, and slow your heart rate the worse shape you're in. I believe we can compare this to our life with Christ.

Because of our problem with sin, Christ's design of sanctification, and the fact that we will never come to perfection here on earth, we will continually struggle, continually have to seek forgiveness, continually get out of "breath" and continually have to trust that Christ will carry us further along in life. As I grow in age, and maturity and walk down this road of life with Christ, He is continually sanctifying me and bringing me to know him deeper with more intimacy. I learn to trust him more, see him more, love him more, and wait upon him with more patience. Therefore, I'm in better "shape" than I was when this journey first started. I used to think that salvation was a one time deal. You said the words, accepted Christ and then you were transformed into a christian "Batman" stopping evil in your life and the lives of others. I was completely wrong. Salvation is not the end, it is the beginning of this journey with Christ. Just like training for a marathon, it hurts, it's not fun, it takes time, it takes commitment, it takes discipline, it's a process. But in the end the process will be worth it. You may win some events along the way, you may lose some, but all the while your improving, you're growing, you're being sanctified. Your focus becomes different. Things that used to matter don't matter anymore, you become committed to the goal, committed to the prize, you want to win. (1 Corinthians 9:24-27) (Only Through Christ's Strength, his doing not ours)

So maybe it shouldn't freak me out when I get out of "breath" sometimes. Maybe I should be paying attention to how quickly I regain my strength, how quickly my breathing comes back to normal, and how quickly I let go of the things that don't help me run the race. But just ask any Olympic athlete, it doesn't happen over night. It takes years upon years of work and dedication. And as believers we have a God who miraculously works out all things in us and through us. (Philippians 1:6) He is the one who will carry out the work. With trust and faith in him, He will bring us along this path and Lord willing we will be able to look back and see that we're in better "shape" than we ever thought we would be.

Heaven and Hell

"The best of life on Earth is a glimpse of Heaven; the worst of life is a glimpse of Hell. For Christians, this present life is the closest they will come to Hell. For unbelievers, it is the closest they will come to Heaven."

-Heaven by Randy Alcorn

True Repentance

In one of my class, I was taught the difference between true repentance vs. false repentance. It intrigued me about the difference between the two.

True Repentance
Vertical
God/Others Centered
Spiritual
Perseverance
Hopeful/Regretful
Willingness to Go to any length
Active
Humility
Responsibility
Unworthy


False Repentance
Horizontal
Self focused
Emotional
Temporary
Hopeless
Demanding
Passive
Prideful
Angry
Blames
Justifies
Minimizes


2 Corinthians 7:10 For godly grief produces a repentance that leads to salvation without regret, whereas worldly grief produces death.

JTH

Fear

I often wonder how much of my life is run by fear. I "fear" too much, if not all of my life is run by it. I try to think back to decisions made, decisions not made, sleepless nights, anxiety over small stuff, large stuff, stuff I even knew was completely out of my control, but still fear. Not the kind of fear that Christ asks of us in Proverbs 1, the reverent fear, the good fear. It's the fear that comes from a broken sinful human that thinks that everything is left up to him. I often laugh at people who knock on wood, won't walk under ladders, kiss the crucifix that hangs from their neck, say they were "lucky", but how often my life is lived like this inside my heart and mind. I might have conquered the exterior proof of my fear, but oh how it runs rampant in my heart. "Oh you of little faith." I can relate to Peter trying to walk on the water, Abraham trying to convince Abimelech that Sarah was his sister, Abraham again trying to fulfill Gods plan on his own terms in having sex with Hagar, some of the disciples who walked with Jesus, watched the miracles, were there for the death and resurrection, and watched him ascend into heaven and still some doubted.

I seem to be more like these people than say someone like Job, who experienced far greater time of possible "fear" than I ever will (Lord willing). How often my mind is stuck in future days, days of worry about how it will all work out. How in the world will this or that be taken care of. It looks so futile to my human brain. Absolutely impossible. I completely miss out on life. The abundant life (John 10:10). The experiences of right now, the location I am currently in, the job, the age, the time, the season, the friends, etc...How often we want something different, complain about where we are and think something from creation can fix this spiritual problem within us. For me it all boils down to control. I think I have it, but I don't. I live my life for it, but know what would happen if it was really left up to me. I confess, I surrender the control over to God, but oh how quickly I snatch it back when the next event of life comes crashing down. I miss the conversations, the moments where Christ is pouring his love out on me, the small things in life, because I'm so consumed by how it will all work out.



So then my question is why? Why do I not trust, not surrender, let go, give up control. This is what I'm realizing about myself. First I'm under the fall of man--Thanks Adam. To be honest a lot of the gospel, okay the whole thing, sounds too good to be true. To further state why my brain tends to struggle with this is because everything is opposite of this truth in the world. From day one as kids we are taught that your life is in your hands, make out of it what you want, but you are in control. So much doing, no talk of trusting, no talk of living in the Spirit (of course I'm only talking about God's chosen people, for outside of his choosing you can't live within the Spirit). We feed the machine, especially here in America where it's in the core of who we are as people. No thought of living outside yourself, that it's not about you, and you were made for a greater purpose. We don't trust his promise that he is able to do immeasurably (can't measure it) more than we could ever ask or imagine. I can't even in my human state think up or imagine how good it could be. (Eph. 3:14-21).



I continually think God is not on my side and that he loves some future version of me. You know the person that you try to become or create so that you can come into his presences. The Pharisaical mindset that you have that sort of control, that sort of ability. That sort of mindset that totally denies the need for a savior, because you are your own. So easy to disagree with, but so hard to live out. I've even at times fallen into such a lie about worry that I feel I have to worry. That it is part of "my part" that we Christians think we have. It validates my involvement in the whole thing. My worry shows that I care, shows that I'm not taking to much, liking to much of where I'm at, because after all it's not about the joys of this life, right. (I know it even sounds stupid, but true.--God help me)



I'm slowing learning what it is to trust Christ. I completely believe that he is in control of my life that he is sovereign over ALL areas of my life. That nothing good that we have or do originates with us, it all comes from the hand of God. He chose me from the beginning, and he will carry out the work until completion. It's just this process of sanctification that isn't fun. It hurts to see how little faith I have in my creator. But he does love me anyways, I can't do anything to change that. How amazing it is, what a beautiful story.



The apostles said to the Lord, "Increase our faith!" Luke 17:5

Incredible Grace

I was out in the yard today cutting down a bush that had started to overtake our house. I was struck by one of the things that God has revealed to me. I have thought about this before but was overwhelmed today with the thought of God's incredible grace he has for all people. We were cursed as men to toil the earth and pick weeds. (Genesis). Since the fall of man even the earth has been growning for everything to be put back as it once was. I was working out in the yard and was realizing that there is still a lot of times that I enjoy mowing the grass, pruning trees, pulling the weeds so that the garden looks great. I just think that it is amazing that God lets us have joy, enjoy the thing that he put under a curse, it just proves his incredible grace that he shows us on a daily basis. I know there are many more times that he shows us his love, his grace, with things that are terrible or tragic for some. For instance, when a storm hits and trees are blown down, and fences break, it provides jobs for some at a moments notice. Tragedy hits and money is put in the bank. Then just the common grace that he gives to all people, even those that don't know him and never will. He is full of so much joy and love that he spills over with so much more grace than what we deserve. When what we deserve is destruction and pain, solice, and joylessness, he gives us so much more than we deserve.