Tears filled my eyes as I looked down at the bread and the little plastic cup I held in my hand. To some it looks funny, and maybe weird, but to me it brought me great joy. It's the tradition of the church to remember the body of Christ and his death on the cross and his blood spilled, the cup, for the sins of his people. I have done this several times in my life, but last night it hit me differently. I really don't remember a time in my life where the cup passed me. Where the bread didn't mean something to me. Although I've been very vocal about my struggle with the church and my frustrations with some of it's teachings, I can't deny the incredible amount of grace that God has had on me in my life. The sorrow, the pain, the frustration that he has kept me from. I don't have the stories that some do. I don't know what life is like without the Holy Spirit. I was too young to remember it. Yes, sanctification is difficult at times, but that is not God's fault, it's mine. It's my sin that is the problem.
So I take this moment to thank God for his church, his body, and his blood. He has never done me wrong. He has never steered me in the wrong direction. He has always been far better to me than I deserve or would have been to myself. He is all about my true joy and satisfaction and will stop at nothing to give that to me. Thank you Jesus for your death. Thank you for your imparting of righteousness to me. Thank you that sitting in church isn't weird to me. It's very comfortable. Thank you for giving me parents that believe in you and did their best to shepherd my heart towards you. Thank you for your songs, hymns, and words. I've been singing them since I was a little boy. I've known your words from a very early age, your scriptures are a joy to me.
And this was all under no merit of my own. I don't deserve any of it. Yet, I can't remember a time where your grace hasn't been upon my head. You continue to give, you continue to sanctify, you continue to save. The greatest trade man will ever know; my sin for your righteousness. What grace you've had for me!
